Going to Hell

I am going to Hell.

That’s according to one of my students.

Not because of anything I did or said.

It’s because of my religion.

I’m a bad Roman Catholic.

He’s a good fundamentalist Christian.

The fact that I’m a bad Roman Catholic is dooming me to Hell.

The fact that I'm a bad one is not the main point.

It’s the fact that I am a Roman Catholic.

Whore of Babylon.

He wasn’t trying to be mean.

He said it like he cared.

He is worried about me.

He’d like me to convert.

From bad Roman Catholic to bad fundamentalist Christian?

I’ve actually attended a few local fundamentalist Christian churches.

Hoping for something better.

I found good music.

Good preaching.

Nice friendly people.

Clean.

Too clean.

I figure God made a world where things need to get dirty.

He’s an earthy God.

I’ve met him in many places where things get dirty.

I’ve planted a garden.

I’ve assisted at births.

I’ve changed diapers.

I’ve repaired tenement apartments and Appalachian cabins.

I’ve been to Masses in migrant worker’s shacks.

I’ve served at soup kitchens

I gave out soup and bread and juice and cookies.

I could imagine my fundamentalist acquaintances giving out soap.

Nice.

There are probably plenty of fundamentalist Christians who would be willing to get their hands dirty to help others.

I just haven’t met them.

So I’ll stick to my stereotype for now.

See – I’m a bad Roman Catholic.

I’m a bad Christian.

Maybe if I tell my student I don’t believe in a literal Adam and Eve he will give up on me.